Evolution is evidence that human beings find it hard to be happy with what they have. Although we now know that we cannot let bad experiences impact our lives as they lead to fear, stress, anxiety and depression. It is hard to keep oneself immune to them. It takes very little to contaminate something good. ‘A spoon of tar can spoil a barrel of honey, but a spoonful of honey does nothing for a barrel of tar.’ – Russian Saying.
People can be traumatised for years by a singular event but it’s rare to be in a lingering positive state triggered by a single happy event. Trauma does not have an opposite!
In the book, The Power of Bad, the authors (John Tierney and Roy Baumeister) present a wide range of tips on how to manage our negativity bias and some interesting trivia on how the unfortunate events magnified by media and politics have created a negative outlook on our minds and have impacted today’s world.
Needless to say, there is up to date research to back these takeaways by the authors.
2 of my favourite takeaways are
1. The Positivity ratio 4:1. – Simply put, If 4 out of 5 days at your current job makes you feel unhappy then it’s time to find another one. Contrary, if you find yourself waking up early on 4 out of 5 days then keep at the habit and don’t berate yourself down for not waking early on that one day! Create your positivity ratio if 4:1 is not for you and maintain it to beat the Power of bad.
2. Pollyanna effect (named after an extremely positive fictional character) - Is the tendency for people to remember pleasant things more accurately than unpleasant ones. This indicates that at the subconscious level the mind tends to focus on the optimistic part of the world and that is a good thing. Even though the negative experiences affect us more strongly than the positive ones, you more often remember positive past experiences than the negative ones. So, empty your mind of the bad memories and have a record of your happy memories for you to read or refer when the going gets tough.
It is easy to implement these right away without beating oneself up for not having everything perfect. As the Authors say, “Bad is Stronger But, Good Can Prevail."